Saturday, May 5, 2012

Review: 7 Days Live

SUZIE HART
7 Days
LAWRENCE SMITH/Fairfax NZ

FUNNYMEN: Comedians Paul Ego, Dai Henwood and Jeremy Corbett star in 7 Days Live.

With the cameras nowhere to be seen, the cast of TV3 panel show 7 Days turned up the filth at Auckland's Sky City Theatre last night.

To give the audience a taste of what was to come, host Jeremy Corbett kicked off with a string of expletives - just because he could.

No subject was out of bounds at the NZ International Comedy Festival show - intimacy with the Queen, Kim Dotcom's nether regions and Dai Henwood's dodgy games at scouts. 

But just like the TV show, they kept it relevant to the week's news with lots of banter about John Banks' antics, Tim Shadbolt's world record and the bear that fell out of the tree

Auckland Labour MP Jacinda Ardern got a decent roasting during the popular segment Yes Minister, getting labelled with nicknames like Juicy Acorn.

However, she also got in a few jibes of her own.

"I'm a little bit nervous, six men plus Paul Ego."

Instead of the usual My Kid Could Draw That, the audience was asked to sketch events of the week and hand them in before the show.  

But former Waitakere College student Kaylee didn't quite get the game, and instead of drawing a news item, gave the comics a bizarre sketch of a man peeing on a marijuana plant, which she claimed happened outside her work the day before.

The joys of what you can't edit out in front of a live crowd.

7 DAYS LIVE

WHERE: Sky City Theatre

WHEN: Thursday May 3  

- © Fairfax NZ News

Review: Rhys Darby in Wellington

SIMON SWEETMAN

Comedy Festival

Rhys Darby: This Way To Spaceship

The Opera House, until today Reviewed by Simon Sweetman

Rhys Darby says a word. Any word. There's a laugh. He has more of a nasal twang to his voice sometimes – but it's funny, no matter the amount of twang, no matter the word.

Sometimes there is an expletive. And that's always hilarious. It's as if Murray (his character from Flight of the Conchords) is actually swearing. In real life. Amazing. Hilarious. There was the bit where he pretended to be an Olympic swimmer heading into a bar, so in he walked while miming some freestyle arm-strokes because swimmers are always swimming – even on dry land. Funny. And then when the Olympic swimmer realised he was in the wrong bar he backstroked out of there – with real backstroke-actions. The side-splitting kind.

Next thing Darby is being a horse. Not just any kind of horse though – a dressage horse. So he's doing really funny side-stepping and bowing and lifting his legs high, keeping them straight as he pretends to be a horse walking backwards. It's tricky for a horse to walk backwards, so a comedian-pretending-to-be-a-horse must take extra care when miming this equine difficulty. Crackup.

The full house exploded with laughter as Darby ran back and forth across the stage trying to land his empty handshake. You see, he had no one to shake his hand, and what was he going to do? He had to ground the handshake, sinking to the stage to slide it down for a landing. Very funny.

Then he mimed his fingers crawling out – as if disembarking from a plane. The fingers did the walking across the stage, up his leg and back into his pocket. But then, hilariously, it was the wrong pocket! So he crossed his arms – next thing he's a walking straitjacket. Make it stop! Make it stop!

Darby entertained with sound effects: a robot noise, doors creaking, imaginary frisbees.

And it is always hilarious, because he was on television in America. And in movies too.

- © Fairfax NZ News


Comic book giveaway to draw in the crowds

Stand back Superman, Iceman, Spiderman, Batman and Robin, too.

CHRIS GARDNER
FREE FOR ALL: Chris Lander, of Mark One Comics and Games in Hamilton, is unpacking thousands of comics to give away on international Free Comic Book Day.
PETER DRURY/ WAIKATO TIMES

FREE FOR ALL: Chris Lander, of Mark One Comics and Games in Hamilton, is unpacking thousands of comics to give away on international Free Comic Book Day.

Stand back Superman, Iceman, Spiderman, Batman and Robin, too.

Saturday is Free Comic Book Day and Chris Lander, owner of Mark One Comics and Games in Victoria St, Hamilton, has just received a shipment of 4000 comics which he plans to give away to punters.

"That's 2000 more comics than last year," said Mr Lander, who is still catching his breath following the rush from last month's Armageddon Expo at Claudelands Events Centre.

Saturday is about kickstarting a reading habit in the young as well as a means of reconnecting with the simple joy of reading a fun story. Everybody who turns up can choose three free comics.

The event is usually tied to the debut of a big comic book-based movie. This year it's timed to coincide with the release of The Avengers.

"We are coming off one of the best years in comic publication in quite a while, largely based on DC's big relaunch but not solely," Mr Lander said.

"Mark One is seeing the continual growth of the graphic novel format and witnessed the periodical format bounce back after quite a few years of decline.

"Although we have lost a couple of customers to digital comics I can definitely say, so far, it has been more positive with digital's bigger reach and easy delivery spreading the word to a bigger audience – and that audience has been turning up at Mark One Comics."

Small press publisher Archaia, known for producing beautiful comics in high quality formats like Mouse Guard, Okko and Rust, are offering the first hardcover book in Free Comic Book Day history.

"Marvel Comics are on the cusp of what will be one of their best years, thanks to the new Avengers movie, so look for lots of Avengers as well as Spider-Man ... and lots more."

Mark One, celebrating 23 years in Hamilton this year, is using the event to hold a 23 per cent sale on selected items. 

- © Fairfax NZ News

Scarlett gets her Walk of Fame star

Scarlett Johansson says she's "totally thrilled" to have received a coveted star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

The 27-year-old smiled broadly as she was surrounded by family and friends to receive the honour.

She was also joined by her Avengers co-star Jeremy Renner who planted a big kiss on her cheek as she knelt down by the California landmark.

"I was totally thrilled, of course, because I feel very nostalgic about that kind of thing," she told the crowd.

"It's a wonderful tradition, and I felt like I finally made it. I really did!

"I was like, 'Wow! I've been in the industry for 20 years, and I've worked since I was a kid.' It felt like a big milestone."

Johannson received star number 2,470 in the motion picture category.

The blonde beauty just wrapped filming on independent movie Under The Skin and will next portray Janet Leigh in Alfred Hitchcock and the Making of Psycho co-starring with Anthony Hopkins.

- Cover Media

Scarlett get her star at Walk of Fame

Scarlett Johansson says she's "totally thrilled" to have received a coveted star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

The 27-year-old smiled broadly as she was surrounded by family and friends to receive the honour.

She was also joined by her Avengers co-star Jeremy Renner who planted a big kiss on her cheek as she knelt down by the California landmark.

"I was totally thrilled, of course, because I feel very nostalgic about that kind of thing," she told the crowd.

"It's a wonderful tradition, and I felt like I finally made it. I really did!

"I was like, 'Wow! I've been in the industry for 20 years, and I've worked since I was a kid.' It felt like a big milestone."

Johannson received star number 2,470 in the motion picture category.

The blonde beauty just wrapped filming on independent movie Under The Skin and will next portray Janet Leigh in Alfred Hitchcock and the Making of Psycho co-starring with Anthony Hopkins.

- Cover Media

What films will make me a Kiwi?

If you see one movie this weekend, make it Good for Nothing.

It is a funny, smart and entertaining western.

But, here's the twist, it was made by Kiwis and Central Otago stands in for the American Old West.

It may look and sound like a western, but there is no doubting its Kiwi origins. Just as Italian directors filtered their national sensibilities into 'spaghetti westerns', Dunedin-born director Mike Wallis has done the same for New Zealand in his 'pavlova western'.

Good for Nothing has a sense of irreverence and absurd humour that I associate with the Kiwi identity.

But, I have a confession to make. I am British.

I moved to New Zealand almost six years to the day and became a New Zealand citizen last year.

But, what are the films I should see before I can really call myself a Kiwi and what will they tell me about New Zealand?

Obviously, I saw a lot of New Zealand films before I moved here and have seen a lot more since. I feel like I have seen the more significant films from everything by Peter Jackson to The Quiet Earth and Goodbye Pork Pie to The Piano. But there will probably be some iconic Kiwi films that I haven't seen.

Let me know what I am missing. What are the more obscure films that I won't have seen?  

Also, what do you think these films will tell me about New Zealand identity and culture?

Is Sam Neill correct when he said in his 90s documentary that Kiwi movies are defined by an unerring sense of ''unease'', or have we all lightened up a bit since then?

I think British film critic Mark Kermode summarised Neil's theory on Kiwi cinema quite well. He said that all Kiwi films have this central theme: "If we stay here we'll go mad or if we get out of here we'll go mad.''

Is that still true?

From my experience of Kiwi movies, and this is a bit of a cliched observation about New Zealand art, there is definitely a darkness in tone.

Heavenly Creatures, one of the best Kiwi films I have seen and certainly Peter Jackson's best, has a fantastic sense of gothic darkness that you can see at work in other Kiwi films.

I was also surprised by how much darkness there was in a more recent feelgood hit like Boy. It was ostensibly a comedy, but it was full of sadness.

So, set me some homework. Let me know what films will make me a Kiwi.

Follow Charlie Gates on Twitter.


Beastie Boys' Adam Yauch dead

Adam Yauch, the gravelly voiced Beastie Boys rapper and the most conscientious member of the seminal hip-hop group, has died. He was 47.

Yauch's representatives confirmed that the rapper died Friday morning in New York after a nearly three-year battle with cancer.

Also known as MCA, Yauch was diagnosed with a cancerous salivary gland in 2009. At the time, Yauch expressed hope it was "very treatable," but his illness caused the group to cancel shows and delayed the release of their 2011 album, Hot Sauce Committee, Pt. 2.

He hadn't performed in public since 2009 and was absent when the Beastie Boys were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame last month.

"Adam Yauch was a pioneer who broke ground with his music and introduced hip-hop to a wider audience," said Terry Stewart, president of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

The Brooklyn-born Yauch created the Beastie Boys with high school friend Michael "Mike D" Diamond. Originally conceived as a hardcore punk group, it became a hip-hop trio soon after Adam "Ad-Rock" Horovitz joined. They released their chart-topping debut Licensed to Ill in 1986, a raucous album led by the anthem (You Gotta) Fight for Your Right (To Party!).

Russell Simmons, whose Def Jam label released Licensed to Ill, said on his website: "Adam was incredibly sweet and the most sensitive artist, who I loved dearly. I was always inspired by his work."

In the seven studio albums that followed, the Beastie Boys expanded considerably and grew more musically ambitious. Their follow-up, 1989's Paul's Boutique, ended any suggestion that the group was a one-hit wonder. Extensive in its sampling and sonically layered, the album was ranked the 156th greatest album ever by Rolling Stone magazine in 2003.

The Beastie Boys would later take up their own instruments - a rarity in hip-hop - on the album Check Your Head and subsequent releases.

The trio of white Jewish kids established themselves as one of the most respected groups in hip-hop at a time when white rappers were few.

Introducing the group at the Rock Hall, Public Enemy rapper Chuck D said the Beastie Boys "broke the mold."

"The Beastie Boys are indeed three bad brothers who made history," Chuck D said. "They brought a whole new look to rap and hip-hop. They proved that rap could come from any street - not just a few."

Yauch also went under the pseudonym Nathanial Hornblower when working as a filmmaker. He directed numerous videos for the group, as well as the 2006 concert film Awesome: I F----- Shot That! He also co-founded the film distribution company Osciolloscope Laboratories, named after his New York studio.

Yauch is survived by his wife, Dechen Wangdu, and his daughter, Tenzin Losel Yauch.

- Reuters

Evangelista seeks child-support

Linda Evangelista

SEEKING CHILD-SUPPORT: Supermodel Linda Evangelista

Tracing her working life from picking cherries as a preteen to the cover of Vogue, supermodel Linda Evangelista told a court Friday she can still command about US$100,000 (NZ$125,730) to walk a runway, though her career has slowed since its 1980s and '90s heyday.
 
In an unusual peek into high fashion in Manhattan Family Court, Evangelista took the witness stand to begin telling her side of her child-support standoff with French billionaire Francois-Henri Pinault.
 
Their five-year-old boy didn't come up in Evangelista's brief testimony Friday; she's expected to continue testifying Monday.
 
Rather, answering questions from her lawyer, the high-flying model who once famously said she and her peers ''don't wake up for less than US$10,000 a day'' sketched a portrait of herself as a woman whose first job - harvesting cherries on a farm in her Canadian hometown - paid US$10 a day. She did that work at 12 to earn money for a bicycle, she said.
 
She worked at a convenience store and several other jobs during high school, pounded the pavement in two continents to get her start in modeling and felt pressured into getting her now-signature haircut, she said.
 
When she first got her famous cut in the late 1980s on advice from some fashion heavy-hitters, ''I cried,'' and organisers cancelled 16 out of some 20 fashion shows she was about to do, she recalled. But soon ''I had every Vogue cover around the world ... and then people came around and decided they like the short hair.''
 
Asked about her career now, the 46-year-old model paused. ''I'm active,'' she said in a calm, careful voice. ''I would like to work.''
 
Indeed she does: She is on the current cover of Italian Vogue, recently did a roughly US$90,000 advertising shoot, and still gets some runway requests, including a 2010 Paris show she had to turn down for a court date - ultimately canceled - in the custody battle, said Evangelista, dressed for court in a tailored white skirt, stylishly boxy gray linen jacket with tan collar and cuffs, and tan spike-heeled pumps.
 
But her lawyer, William Beslow, has said Evangelista's roughly US$1.8 million-a-year income took a dive last year after a major contract with L'Oreal ended, and that's why she's asking a court to order Pinault to chip in for son Augustin's expenses. She says she spends US$46,000 a month on armed bodyguards, 24-hour-a-day nannies and other care for the boy, known as Augie.
 
Pinault, who is CEO of luxury-brands powerhouse PPR and now the husband of actress Salma Hayek, says he has offered for years to pay Evangelista child support, but she responded with the lawsuit. His lawyer, David Aronson, has termed the possibility of a US$46,000-a-month child-support bill ''just ridiculous.''
 
Pinault was grilled earlier Friday about his own spending, including the roughly $62,000 in clothes, US$100,000 watch and half-share in a US$250,000 sports car he bought himself in 2010. Vacations ran him $200,000 that year; upkeep on the garden at his Paris apartment, about US$45,000, he said.
 
His testimony pulled back a curtain on personal difficulties, as well as financial details. He said he had postponed formally recognizing Augie as his son for some months in 2007 because he and Hayek were caught up in concern about her own pregnancy with their daughter, Valentina. For a time, they were told the baby would have Down syndrome, he said.
 
''The situation was very, very complicated. We almost lost the baby,'' he testified.
 
Pinault, now 49, and Evangelista had dated over about four months in 2005 and 2006. He said they spent only about seven days together in all. Augie was born in October 2006.
 
Pinault also has two children by a previous marriage.
 
PPR owns Gucci, Yves St. Laurent and other high-style brands. Forbes recently estimated his family's net worth at US$13 billion.

- AP

Friday, May 4, 2012

Universal's top 10 movie moments

Universal commissioned its poll to coincide with its centenary.

To celebrate its 100th anniversary, Universal commissioned a poll to find the most memorable scenes from the studio's films. Watch our video and tell us about your favourite movie scenes in the comments at the end of the article.  

Universal have also compiled a list with 100 fun facts about the studio. We have chosen our top 15.  You can read the whole list here.

1. Universal Film Manufacturing Company was officially incorporated in New York on April 30, 1912. Company legend says Carl Laemmle was inspired to name his company Universal after seeing "Universal Pipe Fittings" written on a passing delivery wagon.

2. The word "dude" in The Big Lebowski is used approximately 161 times in the movie: 160 times spoken and once in text (in the credits for "Gutterballs" the second dream sequence). The F-word or a variation of the F-word is used 292 times. The Dude says "man" 147 times in the movie-that's nearly 1.5 times a minute.

3. American Graffiti's budget was exactly US$777,777.77, and it was delivered on time - and on budget.

4. Back to the Future's DeLorean time machine is actually a licensed, registered vehicle in the state of California. While the vanity license plate used in the film says "OUTATIME," the DeLorean's actual license plate reads 3CZV657.

5. In the Alfred Hitchcock classic The Birds, Tippi Hedren was actually cut in the face by a bird during the shooting of one sequence.

6. In the movie The Breakfast Club, the students ate the following for lunch: Andrew: A bag of chips, chocolate cookies, three sandwiches, milk, a banana and an apple. Claire: Sushi. Allison: Sandwich with Pixie Stix and Captain Crunch cereal. Brian: Soup, sandwich with peanut butter and jam and apple juice. Bender: Nothing.

7. When Bela Lugosi, star of the monster classic, Dracula, died in 1956, he was buried wearing a black silk cape similar to the one he wore in the film.

8. Neither Michelle Rodriguez nor Jordana Brewster had drivers' licenses or even learners' permits before production of the film in Fast and the Furious.

9. In the infamous shower scene in Psycho, the sound of the knife-stabbing actress Janet Leigh was made by plunging a knife into a melon.

10. Some of the props used in the 2005 version of King Kong were original props from the 1933 version. These props came from Peter Jackson's personal collection and include the Skull Island spears and brightly painted shield, and some of the drums from the sacrifice scene.

11. The first American film to show a toilet flushing on screen was Psycho.

12. Alfred Hitchcock did not choose to conclude the film, The Birds, with the usual "THE END" title because he wanted to leave the audience with the feeling of unending terror and uncertainty.

13. The children who sang the song, "Every Sperm is Sacred" in the Monty Python film, The Meaning of Life, later said they had no idea what sperm was or what they were singing about.

14. When you hear the sound of the crowd cheering, "Spartacus! Spartacus!" in the movie Spartacus, it was actually a pre-taped recording from a 1959 football game at Michigan State University's Spartan Stadium.

15. In The 40-Year-Old Virgin, the films that are watched by the "employees" in the Smar-Tech store are all produced by Universal.

- © Fairfax NZ News

Jack White taps a blue vein

Jack White, the former White Stripe, has bathed his first solo album, Blunderbuss, with a pale blue palette. It informs the album artwork, the touring stage presentation and the outfits of his backing band, which alternates between all-male and all-female lineups.
 
Since he was a teenager in Detroit, White has carefully colour-coordinated his work. While recording Blunderbuss in his studio in Nashville, Tennessee, White played on a pale blue telecaster and an old pale blue amplifier.
 
''I said, 'Well, these are my hand tools. It's all going to build up from this,''' White said.
 
The 13 tracks may be the best compendium yet of White's particular blend of American music. There are electric rages (Sixteen Saltines), country blues (Trash Tongue Talker), rockabilly (Rudolph Toombs' I'm Shakin, the lone cover) and folk ballads like the lilting Hip (Eponymous) Poor Boy.
 
After funnelling his songwriting through various band conceptions - the White Stripes, the Raconteurs, the Dead Weather - White is directing his latest production without artifice. Or, at least, less artifice.
 
''The funniest thing is that every album I've done and every band I've been in have been happy accidents, including this one,'' said White, speaking from his home in Nashville. ''If you just write songs and don't tell them what to be - don't tell the song to be a country song or a rock 'n' roll song - then it becomes what it needs to be in the end.''
 
Blunderbuss, which debuted on the Billboard album charts this week at No. 1 with about 138,000 copies sold, according to Nielsen SoundScan, was particularly unplanned.

When the rapper RZA didn't make it to a scheduled session at White's studio, White decided to start working up some songs of his own. It wasn't until well into the process that those in the room - a collection of session musicians and others - understood the project taking shape.
 
''I didn't know we were actually making a solo record until he started wanting to sing on it,'' said engineer Vance Powell, who has frequently worked with White. ''There was never any conversation: 'OK, we're going to start my solo record today and I want it to sound like this.'''
 
Instead, White worked in the orchestrating mode he became accustomed to while producing dozens of albums and singles for his label, Third Man Records.
 
''Doing it to my own song was something brand new,'' he said. ''When you're in a band, if I'm in the Raconteurs, I don't walk around the room and tell everyone what to play. I say, 'Here's my song' and the drummer plays what the drummer wants to play. I don't tell people what to do.''
 
Third Man prizes analogue recording and limited-edition vinyl releases. It has released everything from a single by Tom Jones (the recent Evil) to a track for the Alabama Shakes (the southern rock sensation that will join White on tour) to an album by Karen Elson (White's ex-wife and mother to their two children, who also sings back-up on Blunderbuss).
 
''He pushed me real hard, but I think he pushed me right into the 21st century,'' says the 74-year-old Wanda Jackson, whose ''The Party Ain't Over Yet'' was produced by White. ''I would liken him to a velvet-covered brick. He's going to get his way.''
 
White's method on ''Blunderbuss'' was to ''shake it up day to day.'' He would scrap songs and reform them in another style; call in the female band one day and just the guys the next; feign a prepared song and improvise something on the spot.  The opening riff from Sixteen Saltines came out of simply trying to test the reverb.
 
White, widely considered a guitar virtuoso, also continues to push the screechy texture of his playing. The dual-tracked solo on Weep Themselves to Sleep is a highlight.
 
''Nowadays, to put a 'guitar solo' onto a record, it better be pretty damn good,'' he says. ''If I'm going to play a guitar solo, I better be breaking the whole song apart.''
 
One riff of White's could reasonably be called one of the most widely celebrated. His guitar line on the White Stripes' Seven Nation Army is routinely sung in sports arenas around the world - a remarkable reverberation for a two-piece blues band.
 
''The part I love about it is people are chanting a melody, not lyrics or a rhythm - which is pretty, pretty amazing'' says White. ''You don't own it anymore. It's everybody's.''
 
The White Stripes, the duo of White and drummer Meg White that produced six studio albums before officially splitting in 2011, remains a foundational experience to White. He can sound slightly wistful about the group.
 
''The truth is, it's the most challenging thing that ever happened to me,'' he says. ''There was no bigger challenge than that - to try to win people over with just two people. It will be hard for me to ever think of something to challenge myself as much as that because of its simplicity.''
 
One might expect a solo record to be a more direct line into White, and perhaps if you add up the ingredients - the Rhodes piano, the mirrored effect on a drum beat, the howl of rebellion - it is. But don't go reading the tea leaves for song meanings. He writes, he says, as he always has: in the guise of a bluesman singing about ''some kind of stories, some kind of struggle.''
 
''I never look at any of my songs as being first person, 'This is about me,''' says White. ''I've never written in that style, and if even if I did, I probably would never tell people that I was. It would be too close to home to give that away.''

"SIXTEEN SALTINES" | Jack White from AG Rojas on Vimeo.

- AP

Pepsi brings back Michael Jackson

PepsiCo Inc. is going on a reunion tour with The King of Pop.

The Purchase, New York-based company on Thursday announced its deal with the estate of Michael Jackson to use the late pop star's image for its new global marketing push.

The nature of the promotion will vary by country, but will include special edition cans bearing Jackson's image, a TV ad in some markets and chances to download remixes of some of Jackson's most famous songs.

Pepsi, which first partnered with Jackson in 1983, did not disclose the terms of its deal with the singer's estate.

The promotion is part of a global marketing blitz planned for the year ahead by Pepsi, which is looking to revive its brand and win back market share from The Coca-Cola Co.

Next week, Pepsi is also launching a TV ad featuring singer Nicki Minaj and announcing details of its partnership with Twitter to stream concerts online.

The broader "Live For Now" campaign is intended to amplify the company's longstanding ties with pop culture, said Brad Jakeman, who oversees the creative strategy for Pepsi's carbonated drinks around the world.

Pepsi has a lot riding on its new push. Although the company has a diverse portfolio of brands including Frito-Lay, Quaker Oats and Tropicana, it's often judged by the performance of its namesake cola.

And in 2010, Pepsi was knocked out of the No. 2 spot among sodas in the US by Diet Coke, with Coke remaining in the No. 1 position, according to the industry tracker Beverage Digest.

Last month, Pepsi also reported that volume in its key Americas beverages unit slipped by 1 percent in the first three months of the year.

The Jackson promotion is one aspect of Pepsi's strategy to reverse that slide. Consumers in the US and China will be the first to get a taste of the campaign in coming weeks, which is timed to coincide with the 25th anniversary of "Bad," the singer's multiplatinum album. The campaign will spread to about two dozen countries by fall.

In the US, the company is rolling out collectible 16-ounce blue cans that bear an image of Jackson striking one of his iconic poses. Consumers will be able to scan codes on the cans with their phones to download remixed tracks from "Bad."

In the Chinese market, consumers will also see a TV ad featuring Jackson's music. Contests will also let consumers win tickets to a Michael Jackson-inspired show by Cirque du Soleil and leather jackets inspired by the singer's style. The global campaign builds on Pepsi's deal with the singer's estate last year to use his image in a commercial that premiered during the The X Factor TV show last year.

Although Pepsi is banking on the nostalgia Jackson can evoke, the partnership also resurrects painful memories.

In 1984, Jackson's hair famously caught fire while filming a commercial for Pepsi at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles. The blaze happened after a spark from a pyrotechnics display landed on the singer's head. Jackson suffered severe burns and many trace his addiction to painkillers to the incident. Pepsi gave Jackson US$1.5 million as a result.

Other music partnerships have led to controversy for Pepsi as well. In 2002, conservative commentator Bill O'Reilly ran a segment criticising Pepsi for an ad featuring the rapper Ludacris. The company pulled the ad the next day, but ran into trouble a few months later when it ran ads featuring Ozzy Osbourne, who is known for peppering his speech with swear words.

Hip-hop mogul Russell Simmons urged a boycott and the issue was resolved after Pepsi agreed to donate US$3 million to charity.

The partnership with Nicki Minaj hasn't yet raised many eyebrows, even though her lyrics also contain profanity and sexual content. Jakeman noted that Minaj's song Moment for Life was selected for the ad because of specific lyrics that perfectly captured the Pepsi ethos of living in the moment.

- AP

The G.C. worries tourism industry

Gold Coast tourism representatives are hoping New Zealanders do not get the wrong idea about their area from tawdry new reality TV show The G. C.

Critics had little complimentary to say after Wednesday's first episode of the show which follows a group of young Maori chasing their idea of the Australian dream on the Gold Coast.

The catcalls were all the more shrill because NZ On Air had spent nearly $420,000 of taxpayer money on the show.

Last year 174,000 New Zealanders visited the Gold Coast, making this country the area's largest overseas tourist market.

Gold Coast Tourism chief executive Martin Winter said the series focused on a small segment of the community, and a particular kind of lifestyle which was less mainstream but potentially more entertaining for television audiences.

"We would prefer for The G.C. series to have taken a broader and more positive approach to the city by successfully showing the larger qualities of life in the region and avoid the cliched Jersey Shore format," Winter said.

"But we aren't in the business of television production and we aren't involved in the show, so it is up to the producers to figure that out and to the audiences to make up their own mind."

Despite Winter's concerns, The G.C. is not all bad news for the Gold Coast's tourism industry.

It starts with enticing shots of long, sandy, sunny beaches and the Gold Coast downtown area, which could prove hard to resist for many New Zealanders as the drab hand of winter sends a chill through this part of the world.

The G. C. creator and producer Bailey Mackey said the show was "at the other end of the scale" from the depiction of Maori seen on shows such as Police Ten 7.

Viewers should give it a chance, he said.

- © Fairfax NZ News

Going Gaga for history

ELENA BURGER
History Gaga

GOING GAGA OVER HISTORY? s: Revolution in France (Bad Romance by Lady Gaga) featuring Amy Burvall

Teens resent history because it can be boring, repetitive, and hard to understand. Adults claim to hate pop-music for the same reasons. So what happens when a high-school history teacher mashes these two things together? A YouTube success, apparently.

The YouTube channel History for Music Lovers was created by Amy Burvall and Herb Mahelona, who are both high school history teachers in Hawaii. They parody various historical events and icons by re-writing the lyrics of well-known pop-songs, dating back to the 60's.

Students around the world learn about the Black Death to the tune of Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani ("There ain't no cure for THAAAT, girl, you'll be dead in no time FLAAAT girl"), the art of Leonardo da Vinci to the tune of Dear Prudence, or my personal favorite: the life of Mary Queen of Scots to Jenny from the Block ("Don't be foolin' with the crown that I got, I'm still, I'm still Mary Queen of Scots").

The most-watched parody, with over 835,000 views, is Revolution in France,  sung to the tune of Bad Romance by Lady Gaga. The video's popularity probably has more to do with Lady Gaga than Marie Antoinette. This is what makes the videos so effective: students can learn history within the comforting cadences of pop-music.

I stumbled across this channel via Facebook, after a friend of mine in the middle of her Ancient History HSC preparation linked the Black Death video to another HSC-addled friend. "Whilst 'studying' for ancient I found this youtube channel--dunno if you can find something for Modern but hey" she wrote.

The videos are endearingly cheesy. They feature creator Amy Burvall in period and parody-appropriate wigs, green-screen colour saturation turned way up. Burvall is attractive and looks thirty-something; one YouTuber said "I wish I had a hot high school teacher that made music videos to teach history ... I might actually have paid attention!" She also does her own singing.

But how did Burvall's channel evolve into a "study" tool for highschoolers worldwide?

"It really started out as something I did for my own amusement" says Burvall  in an email.  "We seemed to get ideas left and right - where everything suddenly became an idea for a song! The students took to them right away, and eventually began suggesting songs and topics."

Comments on Burvall's channel are resoundingly supportive, but the ones that she considers to be "disturbing" are remarks like: "Your video was more helpful than my textbook." At the same time, Burvall says the YouTube users who claim that they've learned more from the channel than the classroom validate what she and Herb Mahelona are doing.

"I do feel a bit sad when a student claims to have learned more about the French Revolution in 3 minutes than from 2 weeks of lecture, but then again, traditional textbooks and lectures ... are really just longer 'summaries' of a topic."

"Sometimes I think our videos serve as a mere spark to deeper learning - well, that is what they are supposed to do. For example, Marat is not mentioned in our French Revolution video, but David's 'Death of Marat' painting is featured. You would only get that if you'd studied it or were prompted to by your teacher. We had someone write that they were intrigued by that clip, and had to research the painting afterwards on their own ... they ended up spending hours doing so."

Honestly, I don't know who Marat is, and despite being entertained by Burvall's French Revolution video, I didn't feel the urge to find out. When I came across the channel, I was quite happy clicking from video to video, taking superficial delight in how historical events I had (and hadn't) learned about in class could be transposed into the time limit of a pop-song.

And maybe superficial delight is the point "It's not really a mission to change the world or our classrooms," says Burvall, "we do the videos for personal pleasure as a creative outlet and just thought they'd be helpful to some students and instructors. As it turned out, they were."

History for Music Lovers didn't teach me more than a history lesson. It didn't make me want to close out of Facebook or YouTube and feverishly research historical details. And I certainly wouldn't pay more attention in class if I had a hotter female teacher.  But for the first time, in the face of something that could be boring, repetitive, and hard to understand, I found something that was, quite frankly, fun.

Violinist wowing crowds

Chch's Yoomia Sim to play at Opera House

Yoomia Sim is a modern violinist and music teacher with a difference and I don't just mean the "Angelina Jolie leg" photo shoot.

But it's a little simplistic to compare her to the likes of Vanessa Mae just because they both play electric violin.

"We are the same in that we are two Asian chicks who play the violin," Sim laughs.

"Yes, I am a classically trained violinist with an electric violin, but I am not playing crossover classical. My passion is in improvisation, electronica, tango, Latin, gypsy and funk.

"I am not like anybody else."

Born in Korea, Sim has lived in Christchurch since she was 11.

She has been teaching violin, piano and music theory for more than 12 years. Her aim is to inspire her students "aged from 6 to 55", and to pass on a passion for music.

When we speak, Sim has recently returned from a support slot on stage with Michael Bolton at the Sydney Opera House.

She had been dared, she giggles, by musical accomplice Christchurch-based Latin guitarist who performs as Dr Sanchez, to drop in a line from Bolton's turn as Jack Sparrow from the song of the same name by American comedy group The Lonely Islands.

"He dared me to say that line 'this whole town is a pussy waiting to be f...ed' from the song he did, but when Michael Bolton put his hand out to shake my hand I was too shy."

Her charismatic violin playing has led her to performing in New York, Philadelphia, Washington, Toronto, Montreal and across Europe with performances in Britain, France, Italy, Spain and Turkey.

In the midst of her travels to 30 countries she cycled from Britain to Prague, helped to build an animal sanctuary in the Amazons. ("It was a little scary, I had a hammer, I was helping to build a sanctuary for the pumas and monkeys, lots of spiders and crawling things"), volunteered at orphanages in Peru and became a divemaster in Colombia.

She performed across South America, playing everywhere from Buenos Aires to Lima, Sao Paulo and Rio de Janiero.

After five years of travelling, she returned home in 2008 with her Ted Brewer clear violin as a modern violinist.

"It was around that time that, after a lot of soul searching, I knew I had to follow my instincts."

Since then she has performed at outdoor electric music festivals such as Spring Equinox and Mystic Forest, relying on her improvisation skills.

On February 20, 2011, Sim performed in the Christ Church Cathedral as part of the Festival of Flowers, it was to be the last live performance in the Cathedral.

At the time she was working for fashion designer Trelise Cooper and had her own music studio in the Music Centre where she was recording an EP and where she would teach her students.

Like many other Cantabrians, the earthquake on February 22, 2011 changed Sim's approach to life.

"After the quake, I knew more than ever that I wanted to make music my whole life and to put all of my heart into it," Sim says.

"I left my job working for Trelise, but she now sponsors me so I get to wear the clothes and I hope to do some performances at fashion shows.

"My violin was trapped in my music studio, in the Music Centre next to the Basilica - it was red- stickered. I was so fortunate, a Singapore soldier risked his life to go inside the building with me three days after the quake to get it. I met him at the cordon and I told him my precious possession was there. We went in with walls coming down, we climbed three staircases filled with rubble.

"When we got to the door of my studio the door was jammed, but he knew martial arts and kicked it open. I rescued my violin. I will never forget that someone did this for me, that they understood how precious it was."

Sim began to learn to play piano at the age of 6 and "accidentally" fell in love with the violin at 9 when, in lieu of a babysitter, she was put into her younger sister's violin class and her teacher discovered, Sim says, that she had perfect pitch. At the age of 16 she was admitted into the music college at University of Canterbury on performance violin, emerging at 20 with a bachelor in music. Later she combined continuing her music studies in Italy and Spain with her love of travel.

She has received numerous music scholarships and appeared as a soloist for Canterbury Philharmonia and the New Zealand Secondary Schools orchestra.

Her love of music came from her parents, she says. Her dad was a self-taught guitarist and lead singer in a rock band, her mother a lover of classical music.

A connection with an Australian-based contact has led to memorable performances this year.

"I played for Il Divo at the Sydney Myer Ball in Melbourne, I was the first violinist for Olivia Newton-John and in Auckland I played for Will Martin."

She is touring across New Zealand and Australia and her name is one you are sure to see in the future - whether it's performing with Dr Sanchez at the local Almeidas Tapas Bar on a Monday night every now and then or energetically leaping around the spotlight of the Sydney Opera House.

On Wednesday night she played alongside Dr Sanchez, supporting Mara TK of Electric Wire Hustle in his solo show.

"Mara is a cool ginger Maori, very funky, I love funk and Latin styles, they really get me right here," she say, emphatically placing her hand on her heart.

Her violin has, she says, always been a way of escaping everyday realities. With precise movements she places her hands on the table in front of us to demonstrate how she practises each day - half the time spent on the classics, the other half "free".

"The classical training is good for discipline. The other side of me is in the improvisation where I am just me, I am finally free."

Yoomia has been chosen to support Florence and the Machine at the Sydney Opera House on May 25-26. It's not an ordinary concert by Flo-Mo; she will be accompanied by the Ceremonials Orchestra consisting of over 40 performers.

- © Fairfax NZ News

Jan Maree's hairy escapades

LAURA WESTBROOK

Jan Maree's life is in her suitcase. The New Zealand comic has moved out of her house in Hamilton, sold her possessions and says she's enjoying travelling light.

"I'm quite comfortable that I don't have a great choice in outfits. It cuts down the prep time everyday," she quips.

It's been quite a year for the comedian, who's been described as a chauvinist's nightmare. She was the first female comedian to win New Zealand's highest accolade, the Fred Award, for her 2011 show Fever Bitch. She used the $3,000 prize to help fund some travel to Indonesia and Europe and ending in Melbourne for the Comedy Festival.

Her new show - Hairy Today, Gone Tomorrow - chronicles Maree's travels as well as her attempt to connect with her roots as the daughter of a "Croatian and Kiwi girl from Central Otago."

"For me, this show is about going to Croatia and the hairy escapades along the way. I don't have a problem with the audience hearing what really happens to me. I get great delight out of hearing people laugh at those things out of recognition. I'm not talking about anything that's not in the realms of any New Zealander, because we are all from somewhere else.

"I've wanted to write a travel show for 10 years, but I figured don't force it. The nice thing is I've finally managed to do that and it has a greater meaning than just some joke, which is what I always try and do with my shows."

While in Croatia she visited her grandfather's birthplace, Mala Duba. He died when she was 14 and was the last member of her family that spoke Croatian.

"There was a lot of mirth and misadventure to do with not being fluent in the language. I thought with some basic phrases I had, I would be sweet. But it turns out - not so much."

 "Yugoslav people are naturally passionate, as you can hear I'm shouting down the phone at you, but it's actually my natural talking voice."

She frequently peppers the conversation with witty asides.

"I don't know how easy it is to learn a language at 38 - What did you say Jan? 38? I know, but I don't look it - I don't know how easy it is to learn more conversational Croatian, but I'm going to give it a go."

Maree has been in the comedy industry for 17 years and, up until recently, had not planned on performing in the UK.

Her company, MX: the Jan Maree eXperience, tours comedians throughout the North Island and was recognised with the President's Trophy for services to comedy in 2009. She also won the best female comedian award and best show at the New Zealand International Comedy Festival in the same year, cementing her status.

"I really love New Zealand and I always thought I could carve out enough of a career here to keep me satisfied in my craft. Moving from Wellington to Auckland was a big change, then moving to Hamilton to work for breakfast radio was another. You go through changes in life and then it hit me and I needed a fresh challenge."

Maree performed at the Top Secret Comedy Club in Covent Garden, London and then travelled to Edinburgh to do a show at The Stand.

"I thought this is it. You've got one chance, make it count. After my gig, the booker [at The Stand] came up to me and invited me back in July."

Maree will perform around England for three months before travelling to Indonesia to do a gig there for the first time.

The comedian said she was heartened to see more female comics rising through the ranks.

"I've never believed it was harder to be a female on stage. If anything, I've always tried to view it as a more positive thing simply because there is usually one girl in the line up and five guys, which means you have the opportunity to be the superstar.

"It's like when you have five jelly beans and one chocolate. Jelly beans are good, but chocolate it totally better and the chocolate one will always stick out."

Details:

Jan Maree performs in Wellington tonight and tomorrow at the Fringe Bar and in Auckland from May 15 to 19 at Vault at Q.

More information www.comedyfestival.co.nz

- © Fairfax NZ News

The G.C. depiction of Maori: creator

PALOMA MIGONE

The creator of The GC says the cast of the new series depict Maori people today.

Outrage was growing at NZ On Air's decision to spend nearly $420,000 on the show, which critics were slamming after its first episode on Wednesday.

Creator and producer Bailey Mackey wasn't fazed by the negative reaction, but said hurtful comments towards him and his cast were ''disappointing''.

He told Radio Live viewers should put the first episode into context and give the show a chance.

''In course, over eight episodes, I think it will become clearer,'' he said.

The NZ On Air funding was given to create something of the past, present or future of the Maori people. And according to Mackey, the show was ''actually a depiction of Maori presently''.

He said some people would like to see Maori at "the bottom of their shoe" in shows like Police Ten 7, with statistics of obesity, smoking and crime stacked against them. ''But here is a show at the other end of the scale.''

Mackey said the cast were Maori and were ''proud of who they are''.

''This is a relevant demographic. These are New Zealanders who are currently residing in Australia. From a Maori point of view, it is seeing how people handle the depiction of young, good-looking and confidently Maori people in prime time,'' he said.

Labour MP Shane Jones said he watched enough of The GC to conclude it was a ''low brow version of Jersey Shore''.

The cast couldn't reflect Maori people as no one person could define the culture and its people, he said.  

''Having lived in the Gold Coast it's just a reflection of the lifestyle. Those guys are probably having a great time, probably wasting time.''

As for whether he was comfortable with Maori being portrayed as self-centred, partying youth, Jones said ''it doesn't hugely bother me''.

''It's probably evidence why the exodus of some Kiwis are good for New Zealand.''

A Facebook group, asking for The GC to be cancelled had accumulated more than 7900 likes by this morning, while the official The G.C. fanpage had 9700 likes.

On the Scoop website, Tom Frewen yesterday pointed to the disparity between NZ On Air's description of the show when it announced funding had been approved last August, and the way TV3 promoted the show.

NZ On Air explained the show, then called Golden Mozzies, looked at seven Maori families living on Australia's Gold Coast.

"The TV3 series will explore emigration from a Maori perspective and how Tikanga Maori supports them as they adapt to life in a new country."

In contrast, TV3 said: "The G.C. follows the lives of a group of talented and attractive young Maori as they work hard and play even harder in Australia's favourite playground, the glittering Gold Coast."

Broadcaster Mike Hosking said television had reached a new low.

"Congratulations to TV3 for providing this country with the most appalling, low rent, pointless piece of televisual crap I have ever seen in my life," he said.

- © Fairfax NZ News


Thursday, May 3, 2012

Geeking out with the Johnsons

Well, with all that GC madness out of the way, let's revisit Wednesday night and talk about another group of GCs - the Johnson brothers, who have found themselves in trouble with a goddess, a giant, a hammer-wielding maniac, another goddess and a really big stick, as we make our way to the final few episodes of the second season.

(Warning: Spoilers from Season 2 of The Almighty Johnsons, especially Wednesday's episode, follow.)

Okay, they aren't in trouble with all of those things - at least, not anymore - but the four brothers at the centre of The Almighty Johnsons are certainly in a state of turmoil, especially after the surprise kidnapping of Gaia at the hands of a van-load of mysterious masked assailants at the end of the most recent episode*.

20120504And while the van probably wasn't being driven by the Libyan terrorists from the first Back To The Future film**, the true identity and motivation of these characters is something that we'll have to wait a week to find out.

But here's a legitimate theory: my dad thinks (and I agree) that the van is full of the Maori gods - a theory supported by a) the fact that the number plate on the van (R0NGO) is also the name of one of the major gods in Maori mythology ( Rongo is the god of food, and the brother of Tumatauenga (the god of war), Tane (the god of forests) and Tangaroa (the god of the sea), among others) and b) that promo at the end of the episode, in which one of the characters introduces the group as the "true gods of Aotearoa". Cross-mythology ahoy!

The timing of that scene was perfect, though. Gaia (Keisha Castle-Hughes) had only just accepted her fate, culminating in an emotionally-charged, destiny-questioning scene with Axl (Emmett Skilton) in front of the bar, and suddenly the poor girl - remember, at this point Gaia had just learnt she was two years younger than she thought, her father was a giant and an assassin, her supposed boyfriend was a dwarf, she was descended from Norse Gods, and she was destined to be Frigg, Axl/Odin's betrothed - was being bundled into the back of a beat-up old van.

It hasn't been the best couple of weeks for Gaia and things seem set to get worse.

The van-napping scene was also timed well in the course of the season, providing a cliff-hanger for this week's episode, an entry point for the final few episodes, and reminding us that this story isn't done yet.

I think plenty of viewers suspected that Gaia was going to end up being Frigg (myself included), even going back to the early parts of the first season, and there is a certain kind of satisfaction in leaning back in your seat and proclaiming "yes, I knew it!" - but the writers on Johnsons, led by creator James Griffin, are smart. They knew viewers would be expecting that.

By announcing Gaia's identity at this point, with three episodes left in the season, I think they're saying "hey, the quest for Frigg is important to this show, but it's only a part of the journey for this particular set of characters."

Of course, that's assuming Gaia is Frigg. My memory might be fuzzy, but I seem to recall that nobody knew Axl's god-identity before the ceremony in which he became Odin, all the way back in the pilot episode. Does the process work the same for goddesses? And if so, how could they be sure that Gaia would become Frigg? Isn't it at least possible that she could be inhabited by one of the other goddess spirits floating around in the ether of space?

Imagine if Gaia went through the process and ended up inhabited by the spirit of Agnetha. Or maybe she's going to be the reincarnated spirit of a Maori goddess - now that would be a great twist!

But I digress.

I'm also intrigued by the developing subplot with Michele (Michelle Langstone) and the big stick. Okay, its more than just a stick - it's The Stick, an off-cut from Yggdrasil, the magical tree of life that Anders visited in Norway, which grants healing powers in the hands of a goddess. While this explains how Michele was able to heal Axl a couple of weeks ago (and fix Mike's bruised ribs on Wednesday), we're still not sure what plans she has for the stick. I wouldn't be surprised if the stick turns out to have some kind of dark power associated with it, causing even more problems for the boys.

(By the way, is anyone else shocked by how easy it is to get into Anders' apartment? Does he even lock the door? Michele decides she needs the stick and the next scene is of her walking through his front door. Any locking mechanism he has in place is just decorative at this point, right?)

I feel like I need to plead to the writers on behalf of Ty, too: please let him be happy! A few weeks ago Ty (Jared Turner) lost his powers and subsequently looked happier than we've ever seen him - now he knows the lifestyle he is missing out on thanks to his Hod-powers, plus he friend-zoned himself with Dawn (Fern Sutherland) and Anders (Dean O'Gorman) has found his true love. Please stop the punishment, writers! Let him smile occasionally! I beg you!

Okay, enough geeking-out from me, time to hand this one over to you:

Are you watching and enjoying the second season of The Almighty Johnsons? What do you make of Gaia's newfound goddess identity? Who were the van-nappers? Do you think Michele will use The Stick for good or evil? Will Ty ever find happiness? Do you even want him to? Post your thoughts on The Almighty Johnsons (so far) below ...

(*) A couple of other random thoughts on Wednesdays episode: I thought Oliver Driver was fantastic as Eggther - the sight of him driving that tiny car was hilarious, while he stole the night with his phone call to Axl to clarify that, when he had said to come alone, he meant to also bring Gaia and the rotisserie chicken. It's nice to have the cast expanding, especially bringing Helen/Idun back into the fold (played by the wonderful Sara Wiseman), as well as the reappearance of Thor, a fan favourite from the first season.

(**) I'm not gonna lie to you: my instinctive reaction to Wednesday's final scene was to assume the van was full of the Libyan terrorists who tried to steal back their plutonium from Doc in the first Back To The Future. Yes, I'm an idiot.

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The winners for Right This Blog!

SIMON SWEETMAN

A couple of weeks ago I let you have your pitch to Right This Blog! We do this a couple of times a year - and it's always entertaining to see the suggestions and then to read the guest-blogs. Entertaining for you and me both.Guest blogger

Someone always tells me that I'm lazy. I can live with this. I've blogged five times a week for nearly five years - I think I'm allowed this indulgence. And I do it for you as much as I do me. It's your chance to get your voice out there - even more so than the comments section. A chance for an extended rant, to flex your writing muscle, and so on...

Maybe one of the winners will be motivated to start their own blog - fantastic. Or the chance to sound-off about 80s hair-metal bands or the state of New Zealand music might be enough - a one-time rant that satiates.

It's not easy writing a music blog for an everyday audience. You have to have something to say. You have to be prepared for people not to like it, that they will not be happy. And that they will not like you as a result. You might not be open-minded enough you see - and that will bring on hatred from those so clearly more accepting than you. You have to endure idiotic comments from morons, as well as thoughtful responses from very intelligent people. The latter are often the ones that (can) really hurt.

You might use short sentences. Or too many brackets. (Or both).

You might not like Jack White.

You might, in the end, have nothing to say.

So, it's been a couple of weeks since I posted the Right This Blog! offer for 2012, and I have been pondering. I want to pick a range of writers and topics - but I want to pick options that I myself will not (for whatever reason) explore. So thank you for all your suggestions. But these are the winners that I want to see right here, written here:

#1 Danny: "I've been trying to get picked for this for ages!" said Danny. And he has a point. An exclamation one. And several suggestions for topics. Fair enough Danny, I'll bite. You're in. Well earned. I love the fact that you've made more than one suggestion on more than one occasion - my apologies for previously overlooking you. You will Right This Blog! But I get to choose the topic from your list of suggestions. So I'm going with "Little River Band - too easily dismissed?" Let's hope so. Do your worst Danny.

#2 Crummy: Apparently I only write about bands that garner mainstream attention. And here I thought I was some aging hipster. It's so hard to know who to believe. Well Crummy tells me that he/she will "write about five up and coming bands from New Zealand (not necessarily bands I like) and get people thinking and talking about something other than the spoon-fed standard". Yes Crummy, you will. Deal.

#10 Darryl: Another list, a few suggestions - and I think Darryl, like Danny, might have played this game before and returned home empty-handed. So I'm definitely keen to see a guest-blog from Darryl. He asks for a Friday spot to explore "Top Ten worst sub-genres". He says "and you thought BBQ reggae sucked". Actually, most people thought that. So Darryl may have a Friday spot to explore this. Definitely.

#35 m.s.p: "I'd like to be considered please". Very polite of m.s.p. And so considered he/she shall be. The topic: "NZ's Worst Album Covers". Well, it's New Zealand Music Month after all, init? Isn't it? Have to do something to mark it.

#62 Jimbo: An offer to write on "the demise of the CD". Well, why not. Jimbo you're in.Golden

So those are the five I have chosen.

But I am not sure if all five will front so let's have a couple of wildcards.

I'd also like to see the guest-blogs from #57 Mark H who said "I feel after reading this I should apologise for prior ****ishness on your blog - particularly after noticing the TISM blog I concede you know your oats. Ergo the only real blog I can touch on is being a d-bag in blog comments". Please write that Mark H.

And wildcard number two will be #4 Johnny Andrews who suggested "From Aerosmith to ZZ Top - how a late-career revival can have a detrimental effect on a rich back catalogue of gems and the overall public perception of the band - both from musos and normal people". There was support for this idea from others - so go to it.

There you go seven guest blogs (if everyone fronts up and delivers).

You have one week to write your post - I need it in my inbox by this time next week. Please email me: my name with a dot in the middle and then the at-xtra.co.nz bit.

You have one week.

Now for those that feel cheated by today's post and have read this far looking for a discussion point beyond the guest-blog selections (the judge's decision is final by the way) perhaps I can offer something.

First of all tonight I'm off to see Bikini Roulette and Lady Parts at Bodega. I am looking forward to this - I know nothing about the bands on the bill. That is why I am looking forward to it. It's good to take a punt.

So what gigs are you seeing this weekend, or playing? Feel free to pimp your gig in the space below. And when was the last time you took a punt on seeing some live music and it paid off?

And secondly - I think I've found my favourite-ever blog comment in all the time I've been writing Blog On The Tracks. It arrived on Wednesday in response to my track-by-track look at Jack White's Blunderbuss album:

Susan M   #30   02:29 am May 03 2012
Repeat this to my face, Simon. This 50-year-old mother of two would sit you down explain WHY Jack White is a freaking musical genius. Of course, what do you know, really? You probably decorate your house in feng shui, too. (BTW, I find your writing style derivative [stealing from Jon Stewart...really now] and simplistic, and your personality to be crass and generally spiteful.)

Now, a week or so ago I received death-threats (plural) for my review of KRS-One; a review that was positive about the artist but suggested that local hip-hop was derivative and embarrassing. People who told me to be more open-minded suggested that I should be dead for not liking a genre that was not a genre anyway, it was a culture I could never even dream of correctly understanding, yo.Dear Editor...

Yeah, anyway, I'm more frightened by Susan M and her love of Jack White/hatred of me and my crass generally spiteful personality than I am of any of the people that told me to watch my back when walking around Wellington at night. So well done Susan M.

Music means so much to people - and by the end of next week I'll have a range of guest-bloggers' thoughts to share, so that you get a break from my opinion and have a chance to check out the attempts made by others in the quest to Right This Blog!

Have a great weekend.

Keep up with Blog on the Tracks on Facebook and follow on Twitter.

And follow Off the Tracks to read 'The Vinyl Countdown' - an album-by-album review of my record collection.

You can email me with blog-topic suggestions or questions.

TVNZ7 scrapped in favour of repeats channel

VERNON SMALL

The scrapped TVNZ7 channel will be replaced with a "plus one" channel that will be a duplicate of TV One run an hour later.

The new channel will start broadcasting on July 1 and will mirror the equivalent TV3 Plus 1 channel.

TVNZ spokeswoman Megan Richards said the decision not to retain TVNZ7, or replace it with a new channel, was driven by economics and the Government's expectation of a 9 per cent return on investment.

"The rationale for this boiled down to some fairly basic facts of life for us. As a commercial broadcaster we need to make a profit, or at least not make a loss," she said.

"The Government expects us to make a 9 per cent return on investment and that's got to be the primary driver, so investing $15 million in a channel that provides no return is not an option that was available to us."

It is understood TVNZ costed a new start-up channel at $20m to $30m. Ms Richards said TVNZ had studied options for profitable new channels.

"Those few options that we've felt were commercially viable we have in fact largely launched already – U, and pay channels Heartland and Kidzone 24, all of which involved sizeable investment."

The new channel was not expected to be "a big earner". But TVNZ acting chief executive Rodney Parker said it aligned with the strategy of reaching more New Zealanders on more screens.

"TV One has been selected as the time-shifted channel to maximise exposure for the great local content, news and current affairs that it features."

It will be broadcast on Freeview and it may also be run on Sky TV once negotiations are complete.

Labour spokeswoman Clare Curran said TVNZ7's closure would be seen as the death of public broadcasting television. "I'm fiercely trying to keep it going."

But if it did go, a minimal advertising channel with content not available elsewhere might be palatable, she said.

TVNZ is not likely to charge advertisers extra, but expects the repeat showing will help protect its market share.

Ms Richards said people who could "time shift" viewing, such as through MySky or using a recorder, would not see the value in a plus one channel.

"But there is a large segment of our population who are free-to-air consumers and who don't have gadgets. We've had complaints for many years that working people with busy lifestyles just don't get home in time to see the news for instance, and the experience internationally is that the opportunity to time-shift is appreciated."

TVNZ was fully aware that fans of TVNZ7 would be disappointed

"But TVNZ simply cannot subsidise a public broadcasting channel and meet its financial performance targets."

The plus one channel was not a replacement or substitute for TVNZ7, she said.

"It's an entirely separate venture that just happens to occupy the same broadcasting frequency."

The issue is expected to be a hot political potato. A vocal lobby group is backing the channel, which AGB Nielsen surveys show attracts more than 1.4 million viewers a month.

The Government is expected to argue TVNZ7's demise was an operational decision for TVNZ, but the state broadcaster believes it had little alternative given the decision to end its separate funding and the requirement for a 9 per cent return.

- © Fairfax NZ News

Soul diva's album looms

BRIDGET JONES

New Zealand singer/ song writer Iva Lamkum talks about her catchy new song 'Bankrupt Visa' and what inspired the rest of her album.

Iva Lamkum is officially the fifth best diva in the world, but she certainly doesn't see herself that way.

The Kiwi soul singer recently featured on American website MTV Iggy's list of the Top 13 Real Divas, who described her vocal resemblance to Amy Winehouse as "uncanny". 

And while the soulful Lamkum wishes she could hear the similarity, the comments have helped grow her confidence in her own sound.

"[Amy's] amazing, so it means a lot. I wish I could sound like her, I wish I could sound like Lauryn Hill; I wish I could sound like Alicia Keys. It's weird how people can say that, but it is a compliment and it makes you think 'okay, you are good enough to be in the industry'- with Iva Lamkum sounds."

And what about that term diva?

"I get that all the time, 'Iva the Diva'. I don't see myself as a diva; I guess I'm just Iva, just another female artist. I don't ask for red roses in my green room, the only thing I ask my manager and publicist for is food.

"But it's a big achievement and it's nice to be acknowledged on the other side of the world.  And it's great that people out there are interested in Kiwi music."

Lamkum is far from a difficult prima donna, but she's right, people are interested in her unique sound.  Music fans will recognise her distinctive voice from her work with Sola Rosa, and her self-titled EP earned her nominations for the Silver Scroll Awards, New Zealand Music Awards and Pacific Music Awards.

But for the past three years, Lamkum's been working hard on her debut album, Black Eagle, living what she calls a double life.

"There were so many other things involved - you've got your personal life and it's hard to have that kind of investment in a project that you love very much and also need to pay the rent."

Lamkum describes the album, out in July, as "alternative-future-soul-rock", calling on all sorts of influences, from her beloved Lauryn Hill to Michael Jackson, Prince and Radiohead.

"Being a musician you have to expand your interests, because you never know what you'll find out there. It's definitely been an eye opener to help me craft this and to show who Iva Lamkum is."

Surprisingly though, given her success, Lamkum never dreamed of being a musician. While she regularly wrote poetry and kept journals growing up, the performance side of things came much later.

"I love writing - it was my first love. And I've ended up picking up guitar and learning it, then drums and singing was the last instrument. It's kind of weird how it all worked out. But I love it, and it's awesome when people appreciate your craft and what you do."

Iva Lamkum's Black Eagle is out in July.

Her latest single Bankrupt Visa is out now. 

- © Fairfax NZ News

Engagement party comes to town

KARL QUINN

The thing that interests Judd Apatow, Hollywood's pre-eminent director (four titles) and producer (40-plus) of a certain type of relationship comedy, is, he says, ''the basic human struggle to not screw it up''.

And in the latest outing to bear his name with pride, The Five-Year Engagement, the struggle is as long and fraught as the title suggests.

With the likes of The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Knocked Up and Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Apatow has crafted a one-man comedy sub-genre that combines juvenile gross-out elements with serious adult themes - particularly that of masculinity in crisis.

''I think that all men are trying to figure out the balance between being a hunter-gatherer and a nice normal person in a relationship,'' Apatow says. ''We all have to pretend we know what we're doing but we really don't, and we're all pretty much a mess inside. Some people are just better at hiding it than others.''

It's not exclusively a male thing, he says, and his smash from last year, Bridesmaids, is testament to that. ''When you're trying to get through the day and you have all the wounds you carry around from how you were raised, there's a good chance you're going to lose your mind on somebody,'' he says. ''And that's fun to watch, especially when it's not you.''

In The Five-Year Engagement, the unravelling is mostly done by Tom (Jason Segel, who co-wrote the film with director Nicholas Stoller). A top chef, he feels his life coming undone after he moves from sunny San Francisco to the frozen midwest for the sake of his fiancee Violet (Emily Blunt).

While she climbs the ladder of academia, he takes the snake ride down from head chef at a temple of gastronomy to sandwich hand in a local deli.

''A lot of people say, 'Why would Tom move across country and give up his job so she can pursue her dreams?' but you would never in a million years ask that question if the roles were reversed,'' says Segel.

''I think it's actually quite sexist to even ask that question. It's what we would expect a woman to do for her husband, so why wouldn't we expect a husband to do it for his wife?''

The film reflects the fact that ''gender roles are finally equalising and some men's egos are having a hard time catching up with that phenomenon'', says Segel, who has worked with Apatow repeatedly since being cast in his TV show Freaks and Geeks as an 18-year-old.

The Five-Year Engagement is, he says, ''a more adult Apatow-type movie ... it harks back to movies like Annie Hall that are comfortable to have a calm exploration of relationships''.

One thing it's got that no previous Apatow film had is Jacki Weaver. Her role as Violet's uptight and bitter English mother is smallish but notable in at least one respect: it's the first cab off the rank in her late-blooming Hollywood career.

In November, Weaver will rack up 50 years as a professional actor. She made her film debut in Stork in 1971 and over the next four decades made 15 feature films, a roll call punctuated by a couple of decade-long spells between pictures. She wasn't ever out of work - there were plenty of TV and stage roles for her - but nor was she always top of mind when it came to casting Australian movies.

''You can't complain,'' the 64-year-old says. ''If people don't want you, they don't want you. Occasionally there would be a film and I'd think, 'I could have played that role and nobody even thought of me'. I never thought, 'I could have played that better' - well, maybe I did a few times. But more often I thought, 'God, I couldn't have done that but it would have been nice to be asked'.''

That all changed, though, when she was nominated for an Oscar for her role in Animal Kingdom in 2011. Suddenly, Jacki Weaver was on the radar in America.

''My whole life has changed, it really has,'' she says. ''Not that there was anything wrong with my life before.''

She's made 11 trips to the US in the past two years, ''none of which I've paid for'', she adds with a girlish giggle. She's made three movies and worked with Shirley MacLaine, Nicole Kidman and Robert De Niro.

There's a pilot for HBO in the can and a role in Charlie Kaufman's new film. The highlight of her Hollywood adventure so far has been playing De Niro's wife in The Silver Linings Playbook, due out later this year. ''That took some beating,'' she says. ''In fact I don't think it will ever be beaten.''

Two years into a phase of her career she never sought or expected, Weaver says she still can't believe it.

''And if it all disappeared into the ether tomorrow, I think I could deal with it,'' she adds. ''Because it has all been so unexpected.''

The Five-Year Engagement is out now.

-The Age

The G.C. divides the nation

MICHAEL DALY

New Zealanders give their opinions on The G.C.

Outrage is growing at NZ On Air's decision to spend nearly $420,000 on new series The G.C., which critics are slamming after its first episode last night on TV3.

Stuff website reviewer Chris Philpott said The G.C.  "might be the worst show on television right now, maybe even the worst show this country has ever produced (even counting Melody Rules)".

"A so-called 'reality' show that purports to profile successful young Maori on the Gold Coast, but which instead twists the day-to-day life of its cast of characters to make them appear morally bankrupt and more interested in amassing money, sex and fame than in any kind of normal existence."

Broadcaster Mike Hosking said television had reached a new low.

"Congratulations to TV3 for providing this country with the most appalling, low rent, pointless piece of televisual crap I have ever seen in my life," he said.

"If a production house had gone out, raised the cash through sponsorship or got the broadcaster to fund it then who are we to complain?

"But New Zealand on Air has put money into this. New Zealand on Air is charged with taking taxpayer money and investing in TV that reflects us. Investing in shows that may not make it to air if it weren't for this state-funded agency."

On the Scoop website, Tom Frewen predicted another embarrassing political storm was about the engulf NZ On Air.

He pointed to the disparity between NZ On Air's description of the show when it announced funding had been approved last August, and the way TV3 promoted the show.

NZ On Air explained the show, then called Golden Mozzies, looked at seven Maori families living on Australia's Gold Coast.

"The TV3 series will explore emigration from a Maori perspective and how Tikanga Maori supports them as they adapt to life in a new country."

In contrast, TV3 said: "The G.C. follows the lives of a group of talented and attractive young Maori as they work hard and play even harder in Australia's favourite playground, the glittering Gold Coast."

Commentator Finlay Macdonald said the programme had even changed  from the TV3 description.

"It's lower down the evolutionary scale than even they were saying in their pre-publicity," he said on Radio NZ.

It was "completely not that show" described by NZ On Air.

In The New Zealand Herald Rebecca Barry Hill said  The G.C. was designed strictly for entertainment value,  "only without much entertainment, and not a lot of value".

"So far, what they get up to is about as exciting as watching tattoo ink dry."

NZ On Air, which was not commenting on the funding of the show, also came in for criticism on its Facebook page.

"NZ on Air is meant to help promote NZ so can you please kill the GC. What a waste of my tax payers money, can I get it back? [sic]" one comment said.

Another said: "How the hell can you justify funding the turd you called `The GC'? I couldn't bare to watch more than 5 minutes of it. Total Dreck [sic]. Heads need to roll over this."

According to television website throng.co.nz, The G.C. was watched by 370,660 viewers, making it the most popular show on TV3 last night.

Overall the most watched programmes yesterday were One News (684,830), Shortland Street (599,070), Fair Go (593,900), Close Up (529,830) and TV One's Animal Rescue, which was screened at the same time as The GC and attracted 512,370 viewers.

The six trending topics on Twitter this morning were all related to the show with #thegc even reaching a spot in the worldwide trending charts last night.

Some described the characters as "plastic" and "fake", but others added "sounds like a pretty accurate portrayal of the Gold Coast to me".

The stars of the show themselves got in on the Twitter chat.

"Yea the haters dnt realise the more they moan about us the more fame The GC gets! Haha and they think wea dumb hmm lol," wrote Rosanna Arkle, an accounts manager and part time model in her off-screen life.

Rugby league star and boxer Monty Betham tweeted to lead character Tame Noema, a scaffolder and property investor: "Everyone's talking about it champ. #ExactlyWhatYouWant. #DoYourThing."

More than half the the readers responding to a Stuff reader's poll said the show was a disgrace, less than 5 per cent said it was great entertainment and 37 per cent said they didn't watch it.

A Facebook group, asking for The GC to be cancelled had accumulated more than 5000 likes by this evening, while the official The G.C. fanpage had 9300 likes.

Speaking on Radio NZ, Stuff reviewer Philpott said he expected the show to rate reasonably well for a couple of weeks.

Next week people might want to see if the second episode was as bad as the first, while the negative publicity would also cause people to tune in, he said.

But he expected that over time, interest would phase out, as had happened with US reality show Jersey Shore.

Comments for this story are now closed.

Did you watch The G.C.? What did you think?

- © Fairfax NZ News


From the Hutt to the G.C.

The Upper Hutt star of controversial new reality show The G.C. says he had no idea it would ''be this big''.

Tame Noema, 23, admits he was initially embarrassed watching himself in the first episode of the TV3 series, which aired last night.

The show follows a group of young, image-conscious Maoris working and partying on the Gold Coast.

''I just laughed through the whole thing,'' Noema says. ''When you hear your own voice on TV it's so weird.''

As for the outcry about the show: ''There's a lot of hate, but a lot of love as well.''

Born in Palmerston North, but raised in Timberlea, the sports-loving scaffolder moved to Australia in 2006 after finishing school at Upper Hutt College.

''Everybody was doing building apprenticeships [in Wellington] and I just thought 'Nah, I'm going to go get the dollar,'' he says.

''There's lots of opportunities over here.

''People don't really realise how much the dollar difference is. I remember wanting to move back home a few years ago and scaffolding was NZ$15 an hour flat rate. Over here I'm on about AU$44-$46.''

Noema's parents and younger brother also moved across the ditch.

''Coming from Timberlea, it's a rough area and even [his brother] was getting into the whole gang thing, so it's the best thing that they've done.''

Nonetheless, Noema maintains strong links to his home town.

''I'll still back the Canes no matter what. Although, I've been losing a lot of cartons lately due to losing bets with fellow workers. But what do you do?''

He says a friend asked him to interview for The G.C. last year.

''To be honest I didn't know what to expect.

''They just said they were doing this show and me, I'm like the easiest going person ever, and I just roll with things. The next thing I knew I was getting ready to film.''

He maintains that what you see is what you get.

"Nothing's different other than there's cameras there. It's not like when you're doing a show with completely random people. Because we're so close it ended up being real fun and easy really.''

Noema laughs at the thought his now infamous vocabulary, which includes terms like ''aunties'' (single girls) and ''creep on'' (scoring girls), could take off in New Zealand.

''The lingo is just us being cheeky and mucking around. It's just random stuff and me, Zane and Jade [Louise] talking rubbish.''

- © Fairfax NZ News